cool guys

we've all met them... we've probably all been one in some capacity at some point in our lives... and i think we can all agree we don't like them or ourselves when thinking back to our "cool guy" times. they're the people who smoke to look "cool" or only listen to "cool" music or they use fancy words to show off their intelligence - basically they're people who aren't themselves because they're too focused on being "cool."
in high school, erick's brother dave referred to these people as "cool guys" (sarcastically of course). and that term has stuck with me ever since.
i was reminded of this last night at the festival of lights parade in downtown salem. i'm not usually a parade kind of guy... mostly because i had to march so many of them... but i thought it might be fun to watch the bands (especially south salem), visit with my dad (who was judging the bands) and it's always fun to hang out in butt frozen weather with andrea. anyway, at one point we were in the mall and i saw this guy with his son... and he was trying way too hard to be a "cool" dad. picking his kid up with one hand and swinging him around all the while looking around to see if he's being noticed for his "cool" talents. he'd kick his son in a playful manner that wouldn't necessarily hurt the boy but did knock him to the ground and then pull him up and yank down on his son's hood. he was acting more like an older brother than a dad.
i've noticed a lot of this with parents of my generation. they seem more concerned with being "cool" and being their kid's friend than being a parent. kids want and need parents and sometimes this means not being mister popular or looking "cool" but instead doing what's right.
being a dad has nothing to do with being "cool" by societal views. it has everything to do with selflessly putting your family first no matter what. in doing this you will undoubtedly find yourself doing some very humbling and dare i say un"cool" things. but in the end, if you've done your job right you will be an actual cool dad with non-troubled kids and one day productive citizens and good parents themselves.